Yesterday, Joe and I were working on our computers across the room from one another, easily chatting back and forth about this, that and the other. Eventually we got to talking about something I had written in my blog.
“So,” I hesitated a moment before asking. “What do you think of my blog?”
I began to sweat.
“It’s good. . . “
“Do you like it?”
“Yeah. I do. I definitely like it. But. . .”
“Well, okay. I’ll be honest. It lacks focus.”
“Well,” I tried not to sound defensive, but I’m sure I did. “It’s just about my life. You know, day to day stuff. I mean I guess that’s the focus. You know. Just stuff that happens that I would chat about with a friend or a neighbor. Like over the back yard fence. Get it?”
“Well, that’s fine, but there still needs to be some kind of focus.”
I was beginning to feel a bit irritated, but he is 18 and knows everything at this moment in his life, so I knew I should listen. It’s like that with teenagers. After this, it’s all downhill as they suddenly have to start learning again.
“What would you suggest for a focus?” I ask.
“Like. . . I don’t know, if I were to have a blog I would focus on politics. Yours could be humor or something like that.”
I spent the rest of the day, and way too much time today, pondering over the idea of my blog and its focus. Or lack thereof.
Following this morning’s Bible study, I made a quick stop at Office Max for shredder oil, then detoured into TJ Maxx to look for extra-long twin sheets for Joe’s dorm room, grabbed coffee filters and asundry items at the grocery store, and finally made a stop at the bank. Focus.
I continued thinking about it when I got home, switched the laundry around, changed the bedsheets, and went out back to check on Dan who was busy mending holes in the fence so the new puppy won’t escape. I had lots of time to think about it as I cleaned up the kitchen, shredded a year’s worth of bank documents and sorted through the kids’ Friday folders from school. I continued to mull over ideas as I cleaned a bathroom, went downstairs to take something out of the freezer for supper, threw in a load of sheets because the puppy peed on someone’s bed which reminded me to run over to my sister-in-law’s house to borrow her baby gates so we can barricade the puppy in the kitchen. Focus. I put on a fresh pot of coffee so Dan and I could have a few minutes together to catch up and discuss some minor issues regarding the State of the Household, unloaded the dishwasher, and made a quick pit stop in the downstairs bathroom, stopping midstream because there was no toilet paper and I had to run upstairs for a new supply. Focus.
While in the upstairs bathroom, I gave 90 seconds' thought to what I will wear to my husband’s ‘post holiday party’ tonight. It was someone’s brilliant idea a few years ago to start having the company holiday part in January – when everyone’s calendar is clear, and I weigh at least 10 pounds more than I did at the beginning of December so that if even I had something to wear, it will be even tighter now than it was then.
After taking a business call and jotting down some notes, I further pondered the notion of having a focus for my blog. Focus. And I keep coming up blank. Nothing. Nil. Nada. I guess it just is what it is. The ramblings of a 40-something (I can still say that for three more months) suburban housewife, who has a need for conversation and to articulate any given thought, even at the risk of talking to myself should no one show up to read and comment. I have to apologize to all of you who keep hoping for something more. And I thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for humoring me and sticking with me, through my aimless ramblings, the product of a pre-menopausal, foggy brain, that apparently is even more lacking in focus than I thought.
And now, I have to go “get gorgeous” and figure out something to wear!